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Barstool DMV Local Smokeshow of the Day – Victoria

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DMV Smokebomb of the day Victoria from Maryland now living in LA. Lava hot. HoCos finest export.

 
Nominate smokes by sending their Facebook link to DMV@Barstoolsports.com.

 

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By Nate posted August 28th, 2014 at 5:35 PM

Your Ravens Preseason Week 4 Viewing Guide – Back To New Orleans To Take On The Saints

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10 days. We’re almost there. One more bullshit football contest left before we get to eat. This week brings us to New Orleans, our first trip back to the Big Easy since we left as World Champions 18 months ago. For most Ravens, this is an opportunity to bask in the memories of Super Bowl success. Others are fighting for their careers. This is their Super Bowl. They’ll fight tooth and nail for every damn inch to be one of those 53 getting a jersey next week. These guys are what Preseason Week 4 is all about. These are their stories.

 

 

Tyrod Taylor

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It’s his show tonight. Given that he’s a free agent after this year, this may be the last time we get to see Tyrod in action with the Ravens. Not because he’s on the cutting board, but because Flacco is as tough and durable a quarterback that has ever walked the planet. Seriously. He’s never missed a game. The guy had to stand for an entire 6 hour flight to Oakland a few years back because he physically couldn’t sit with a hip injury. And he still played that week. But I digress.

Taylor has been adequate so far this preseason, putting points on the board on half of his offensive drives. He worked with Jeff Garcia over the summer to nail down the nuances of the West Coast offense, and it looks like it’s made a difference. But I wouldn’t describe him as impressive. What I need to know is how long can Tyrod keep the boat afloat should Flacco go down. There’s no question in my mind he can’t carry this team on his own for the better half of a season, and especially not the playoffs. But is he the kind of quarterback that can keep us in the race if Joe’s out for a month? 2 months? Or are we boned if it’s any more than 2 weeks? Tonight I’m watching to see how he looks when he’s the general. Time to test our safety net.

 

 

Michael Campanaro and his fellow wideouts

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There’s a logjam at receivers as they cut down the rosters to 53 on Saturday. Kamar Aiken, Mike Campanaro, Deonte Thompson, and Jeremy Butler are all vying for a roster spot, and it’s unclear whether the Ravens keep 5 or 6 guys at WR. The Smiths, Marlon Brown, and Jacoby Jones are set in stone, but who’s gonna join them? I’m confident they’ll go 6 deep. The team invested next year’s 6th rounder in Campanaro, and I can’t imagine them cutting him. I’d love to see him get out there and prove his worth tonight though. As for the 6th spot, I think they’ll take Aiken for his special teams coverage abilities. Thompson has shown that he can produce as a returner, but we already have guys that can do that. Unless he comes up with another big performance, I’d cut him.

 

 

Derek Cox and the cornerbacks

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I’ve talked about cornerback depth all preseason, and rightfully so. Although Webb and Jimbo Smith look to be ready to go Week 1, it’s a disaster area behind them. They made big strides last week, but Ozzie still went out and signed a vet by the name of Derek Cox, who was cut by Minnesota last week. I don’t feel great about scooping a guy not good enough to make the Vikings first cuts, but then again, he was a pro bowl alternate in 2010. And we’re  not looking for a shutdown guy, just another body who can keep his guy in front of him. Webb and Smith are sitting again, so guys like Cox, Chykie, and Franks will carry the load as Luke McCown and Ryan Griffin duke it out for the backup job behind Drew Brees.

 

 

And that’s all I got. I tried to make preseason week 4 football sound fun, I really did. If you’re watching 1st place baseball or SEC football tonight, I certainly don’t blame you. But these games do make an impact down the road. You never know what fringe players might become tomorrow’s superstars. And the Ravens have an opportunity to finish 4-0 in the preseason, which is kinda neat (it’s not, ask the Redskins last year).

 

By banks posted August 28th, 2014 at 4:25 PM

So It Turns Out James Blunt Is One Of The Funniest Guys On Twitter

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It took me a minute to even remember who James Blunt was when I saw a tweet of his last night, and then I kept reading his timeline, and the guy is somehow really funny. James Blunt. The guy who sings the “You’re Beautiful” that you’ll likely hear in a JCPenny or Staples.

Oh and his bio:
 

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“Proof that one song is all you need”. Perfect.

 
 

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By Nate posted August 28th, 2014 at 3:32 PM

The Redskins Starters Aren’t Playing Tonight…But Neither Is Kirk Cousins. Colt McCoy Is Playing All 4 Quarters

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CSN - We already knew that Robert Griffin III wouldn’t play in tonight’s preseason finale against the Bucs. Now it looks like his backup will take the night of as well. ESPN 980 is reporting that Kirk Cousins will get the night off in Tampa and that third-string QB Colt McCoy will handle the quarterback duties for all four quarters. Cousins has seen most of the action at quarterback this preseason. He has attempted 54 passes compared to 20 for Griffin and 15 for McCoy. The decision to bench Cousins is probably a combination of a desire to get McCoy some more work and to prevent injury to the backup.

 

I get it, but it’s still kind of weird. Robert Griffin is the starter for this football team. Scream it from a mountain top, write it in your diary, chisel it in stone, mold it into clay, eat some hay, I just may. So it’s an interesting move to bench not only the starter, but his backup as well. I’m one of the few who actually want to see RG3 play the 4th game. I hate that they have 4, but I figure if it’s there, let him play a series or 2, he needs the reps. But benching Cousins is basically protecting RG3 from having to hear about any QB controversy leading up to the first game of the season. It SUCKS they have to sacrifice Cousins’ progression and development as a QB to protect RG3′s feelings, but it is what it is. Can’t very well have Cousins go out there and go 20/20 for 500 yards and make my head explode. So I thank them for that. Which means tonight we should see a ton of running plays, a lot of swing passes, and a lot of RBs shuffling in and out of protections to see which of the backups make the cut. That’s what I’ll be looking for. Most other positions are pretty much accounted for, give or take a few backup jobs. But the 3rd running back (assuming Helu is the number 2, even though he hasn’t majorly impressed anyone this preseason) is up for grabs.

By Nate posted August 28th, 2014 at 2:52 PM

The People’s Champ Was On The Philly Sports Podcast So Listen To It

 

Soundcloud Link

So last night I drank a few Miller Lites and a few Post Road Pumpkin Ales and joined Smitty on his radio program. Apparently I didn’t suck so it’s safe to ask you guys to listen to it. If you don’t like it, don’t listen to it. If you think my golden voice sucks, well it probably isn’t the best, so suck my taint. But if you’re a Nateaholic and want to hear us talk about football, me get riled up about RG3, and Franco say he hasn’t placed a bet on anything in 10 years which is the weirdest thing I have ever heard a grown man say, this is the podcast for you. It was the first time I ever did anything like this and I think it went above average, which is pretty much all you can ask from me. So listen. Or don’t. I don’t care.
 

By Nate posted August 28th, 2014 at 1:50 PM

MFK Throwback Thursday in the DMV – Former Number 1 Seeds

Megan Fox

Angelina Jolie

Marisa Miller

Total Number of Votes: 7330

Megan Fox:

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Angelina Jolie:

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Marisa Miller:

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TBT time in the DMV. Three ladies who used to be the 1 seeds. Megan Fox was the girl about 10 or so years ago. Nobody was above her in the spank bank power rankings. When she was in Transformers and bending over that car, outrageous movie theater boner. Angelina Jolie was the #1 seed before Fox took the throne. DSLs for days. Big ol cannons. Obviously freaky deaky. The full package. And Marisa Miller. Took my underbritches by storm back in the “SI Swimsuit could get it done” days. And as always, I’m MFK’ing as if I’m back in the day, not how they are currently.

Marry: Megan Fox. When she was the 1 seed, she was the unanimous 1 seed. Every first place vote. Nobody else even got close. She was the girl.

Fuck: Marisa Miller. Those pictures of her rolling around on the sand single handily kept the kleenex company in business.

Kill: Angelina. Crazy unfortunate.

By Nate posted August 28th, 2014 at 12:48 PM

PSA: Centerplate, The Company That Supports Beating Dogs, Does Concessions at FedEx Field

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Quick PSA: Centerplate, the company that supports animal abuse, supplies the concessions at FedEx Field. So if you are one of those people who are against beating the shit out of animals, boycott buying that overpriced glorified prison food at FedEx. Tell your friends. Spread the word. Anything to take money out of those douchebags’ pockets.
 
 

Now pictures of my favorite dog in the world. Can take or leave her owner though.

 

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Hit this dog I kill your family.

 

By Nate posted August 28th, 2014 at 12:03 PM

MLB Network’s Greg Amsinger 100% Predicts Buster Posey’s Walk-Off Home Run, Promptly Goes Crazy In The Studio

 

He nailed ALL of it. Had that feeling in his bad knee, and the bad knee still hasn’t let him down (besides the whole being the bad knee part). Sure, if you throw enough shit against the wall, something is bound to stick, but when that shit does stick, it. is. AWESOME. Nothing beats accurately predicting something in front of your friends. Because everyone remembers when you get it right, but nobody will remember if you get it wrong. That’s why we keep gambling. Yea you can lose 10 straight times you go to the blackjack table, but you’ll be telling stories for years to come the one time you go on that massive heater. And that’s exactly what happened here. Say Posey strikes out, whatever. But when he hits the walk off, it’s parade time.

 

h/t ftw

By Nate posted August 28th, 2014 at 11:41 AM

DraftKings $40,000 Fantasy College Football Is HERE

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Click here to play.

 

Contest Details
-Fantasy College Football Contest – $40,000 Tailgate
-Contest starts Saturday at 12:00 PM ET
-$40,000 in total prizes, $10,000 to first place
-Top 330 spots paid out

Relive the glory days and draft 2 College QB’s, 2 RB’s, 3 WR’s, 1 TE, and 1 FLEX. Stack your team with players from your alma mater or mix and match from schools all over the country. Draft your team now!

 

At long last, college football is HERE. So what better way to kick off opening Saturday than winning yourself 10 grrrrr? Draft your team sober, wake up Sunday covered in cheeto dust with a big ol’ headache, and be 10k richer to boot. Not a bad way to kick off the season, not a bad way at all.
 
 

Click here to play.
 

By Nate posted August 28th, 2014 at 11:00 AM

Little Kid Is PISSED His Mom Is Pregnant And He Lets Her Know

 

This shit is exasperating! When he tossed out an exasperating, you knew it was all over for the mom. Nothing she could say would matter after that. Was just a headshot to her dome. Literally every single thing he said is true. She just had a baby, yep. A third baby is too much and makes no sense. Then he brings up the crying part, and the mom was down for the count. She tapped out like he put her in the Walls of Jericho. He demanded ear plugs, and she had no rebuttal. Kid should have started demanding more things. He had her in the palm of his hand. He was so inside her head at that point, he shouldn’t have stopped with earplugs. Powerwheels, Game Gear, Beanie Babies (all things kids still want nowadays, I’m sure of it). All could have been his.

 
(Calls up Spags, comment section time)

By Nate posted August 28th, 2014 at 10:23 AM
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