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Paulina Gretzky is Pregnant With Dustin Johnson’s Child NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

      Why God WHY?! Just ruin Princess Great One for all of us?! Is that what you want!? And fuck that selfish asshole Dustin Justin for not finishing in her hair. Nobody wants to think about Paulina having a kid. Or weighing more than 90 pounds. Ugh. Kids. Gross. RIP Paulina Gretzky. Never [...]

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Why God WHY?! Just ruin Princess Great One for all of us?! Is that what you want!? And fuck that selfish asshole Dustin Justin for not finishing in her hair. Nobody wants to think about Paulina having a kid. Or weighing more than 90 pounds. Ugh. Kids. Gross.

RIP Paulina Gretzky. Never forget:

 

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PS: It better be a boy. That’s the only way I’ll ever be ok with it if it comes out as the Bo Jackson equivalent of hockey and golf.

PS: It’ll never not be weird she has a “99″ tattoo right above her cooter.

 

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By Nate posted September 23rd, 2014 at 11:50 PM

I Love This Guy On The Rangers Guilder Rodriguez Who Got His First Major League Hit After 13 Seasons in the Minors

Your browser does not support iframes.   Nice feel good video to end the day with. Guy grinds out long bus trips and Motel 6′s and punk kids for 13 seasons for the love of the game, and finally gets his first major league hit in front of his wife and dad. Never gave up [...]

 

Nice feel good video to end the day with. Guy grinds out long bus trips and Motel 6′s and punk kids for 13 seasons for the love of the game, and finally gets his first major league hit in front of his wife and dad. Never gave up on his dream to get to the show, and he got that base hit. Standing ovation from the crowd and tears in his old man’s eyes. Great moment. And even better, later in the game he got another hit which ending up driving in the game winning RBI. Congrats to my man Guilder. A Gatorade bath well earned.

 

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By Nate posted September 23rd, 2014 at 11:19 PM

Barstool DMV Local Smokeshow of the Day – Leni From Annapolis

    Introducing smokeshow Leni from Annapolis. Bangin body, murders the bikini look. Nominate smokes by sending Facbeook links to DMV@Barstoolsports.com.        

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Introducing smokeshow Leni from Annapolis. Bangin body, murders the bikini look.

Nominate smokes by sending Facbeook links to DMV@Barstoolsports.com.

 
 

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By Nate posted September 23rd, 2014 at 5:50 PM

While Kirk Cousins Still Calls The Redskins “Robert’s team” Coach Gruden Simultaneously Said It Might Be Kirk’s Now

Cousins:"I won't change my statement that this is Robert's team." — Mike Jones (@MikeJonesWaPo) September 23, 2014   NFL - Acknowledging his place in the hierarchy of the organization, Kirk Cousins reiterated his understanding Tuesday that the Washington Redskins remain Robert Griffin III’s team. Coach Jay Gruden, on the other hand, is backpedaling from his [...]

 

NFL - Acknowledging his place in the hierarchy of the organization, Kirk Cousins reiterated his understanding Tuesday that the Washington Redskins remain Robert Griffin III’s team. Coach Jay Gruden, on the other hand, is backpedaling from his August declaration that Griffin holds “the keys to the franchise” in his hands. Asked if Cousins might permanently replace Griffin in Washington, Gruden replied, via the New York Daily News, “Crazy things have happened in NFL. I’m not going to discount anything.” Gruden could have remained noncommittal. He could have changed the subject. He could have brushed aside a long-simmering quarterback controversy and stood firmly behind the charismatic star for whom the franchise mortgaged three consecutive drafts. Instead, he conceded the reality that the NFL is a week-to-week operation. Plans aren’t written in stone; they flow like a river. As much as the Redskins have invested in Griffin via draft picks and marketing, the episodic nature of the NFL’s schedule creates storylines that send seasons careening in directions never imagined. Events can unfold to thicken plots and change plans.

 

This is so night and day from last season it’d ridiculous. A level-headed coach whose main focus is to win, and a starting QB saying all the right things. Cousins is of course going to say it’s RG3′s team. He has said all along that he is here to be the backup, and right now he’s just filling in for the starter. And then Gruden. Wow. I love it. He’s here to win football games, not start drama. He doesn’t care about the past. He doesn’t care about the number of draft picks they gave up for him. If he feels Cousins gives the team the best chance to win football games, he’s going to roll with Cousins. And I think that’s the way it should be. We’ve all been very impressed with Cousins so far. He has another soft defense on Thursday vs the Giants, and then the real test will be the Monday night game vs the Seahawks. If he continues to succeed, there’s no reason to put injury-prone RG3 back in at QB1. If he starts throwing picks and floaters, by all means revert back. But as Gruden said, things change. Things happen. You have to adjust.
 

By Nate posted September 23rd, 2014 at 5:18 PM

Dennis Pitta Has Hip Surgery, Is Officially Out For The Year (And Possibly Forever)

Here come the waterworks.

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The Sun  Following another gruesome hip injury that required season-ending surgery Monday to repair the damage, the career of Ravens tight end Dennis Pitta is now in serious danger. One year after fracturing and dislocating his right hip during training camp, Pitta underwent surgery after dislocating and fracturing the same hip again during a 23-21 victory over the Cleveland Browns on Sunday. Pitta will be placed on injured reserve, officially ending his season. Pitta remains in Cleveland as he recuperates from the procedure. Pitta was treated at University Hospitals in Cleveland with Ravens team doctor Leigh Ann Curl consulting with his surgeon. “Unfortunately, his career is in jeopardy,” said Dr. David Chao, a former San Diego Chargers team doctor and orthopedic surgical specialist who doesn’t treat Pitta. “Even if Dennis comes back and plays, he would be at risk for a third dislocation. “Is it worth it for him to run, jump and work out that hard and cause arthritis and increase his chances of needing a hip replacement early in life a la [former Oakland Raiders running back] Bo Jackson? That’s for him to decide. With this information, there’s a very real possibility that he could be done.” 

 

I’ll be honest, I’ve been pretty numb to the Pitta situation. Just a serious case of denial since the moment he crumbled to the turf. Wanted so badly for him to pop back up and be back out there for the next series. Well I dunno what triggered it, but it hit me like a brickload of trucks this afternoon and I feel like I’ll never be the same person again. Just devastating. I no longer have joy. They’ll go out and try to plug in another white tight end alongside Owen Daniels and it’ll just feel all wrong. Like buying a puppy to replace old reliable. He may try to make a comeback, but I just don’t see him being the same ever again. He’s effectively gone. So here I lay Dennis Pitta’s career. Countless moments, gorgeous hair, numerous touchdowns, and 1 Super Bowl ring. We’ll never forget you Dennis.

 

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Rest easy my sweet red zone prince.

By banks posted September 23rd, 2014 at 4:15 PM

Have To Respect Chris Martin From Coldplay For Upgrading From Gwyneth Paltrow To The Star of The Fappening Jennifer Lawrence

  Daily Mail - Although their relationship was only revealed last month, it was recently reported that Chris Martin has fallen in love with Jennifer Lawrence. And the romance is definitely heating up, as these first pictures of the new couple together since they started dating show. Chris, 37 and 24-year-old Jennifer were spotted stepping [...]

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Daily Mail - Although their relationship was only revealed last month, it was recently reported that Chris Martin has fallen in love with Jennifer Lawrence. And the romance is definitely heating up, as these first pictures of the new couple together since they started dating show. Chris, 37 and 24-year-old Jennifer were spotted stepping off a private jet together in Van Nuys in Los Angeles on Saturday, looking very much like a couple who have been together for some time. This is the first time the father of two and his Hunger Games star girlfriend have been seen together since their romance was reported in April. Jennifer and Chris’ relationship was revealed in August but they first sparked rumours they were dating after they were spotted in deep conversation at the after-party for Coldplay’s Royal Albert Hall gig in London on July 1. They reportedly spent the following weeks texting each other. Chris – who has daughter, Apple, 10, and son, Moses, eight, with Gwyneth Paltrow – is reportedly so smitten with Jennifer that he has been writing songs for her.

 

No shit he’s “smitten”. That’s what happens when a girl sends you 100 pictures knuckle deep in herself- you get smitten. They truly are the perfect match. Made for each other. There’s nothing she likes doing more than taking off her clothes and firing out pictures of her mammaries. Evidence shows that’s her favorite downtime activity. Some of us watch TV, some of us get swole at the gym, she sticks a finger in her cooter and snaps a picture. And then Chris Martin. He likes singing songs, banging away on his piano, and ignoring his kids. So he flies her in on the jet, she takes selfies in the jet’s bathroom, and then he gets to sing songs to her while she fingers herself. So really, good for him for the upgrade. Paltrow is a Grade A cunthead who would rather eat vegetables, and JLaw is a Grade A freak who sees how far up she can get the vegetables. Chris Martin and Jennifer Lawrence- really the most romantic love story of our time.
 

 

By Nate posted September 23rd, 2014 at 3:27 PM

Hard Not To Believe This Woman When She Told Police The Reason She Led Them On a High Speed Chase Was Because Her Foot Was Stuck On The Pedal

That is not the face of a liar, that is the face of shame.

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ABC 11 – A woman who allegedly led Johnston County deputies on a chase that topped speeds of 100 mph later claimed her foot was stuck on the gas pedal, said the Sheriff’s Office. A deputy spotted 19-year-old Star Shields Williams’ red Ford Mustang speed by around 10:30 p.m. Monday on Princeton-Kenly Road. The deputy tried to pull her over, but the Mustang sped up while deputies followed it along several secondary roads in Johnston County. Williams eventually pulled over. She’s now charged with felony fleeing to elude arrest, reckless driving, speeding, failure to stop for a light or siren, and driving left of center.

 

You would be hard-pressed to find a judge and jury that wouldn’t buy that claim. And not just because she’s fat. Because that is not the face of a liar, that is the face of shame. She knows she’s fat, and she’s embarrassed. Her foot was so fat she couldn’t move it off the pedal. That’s the face of rock bottom. That’s the face of eating pizzas and crying herself to sleep. And someone that fat knows she’s not going to avoid the police. You gotta imagine she wanted to pull the car over really badly, but literally couldn’t. That’s why she won’t be convicted. She’s no criminal. This is America. Being fat isn’t a crime.
 

By Nate posted September 23rd, 2014 at 2:33 PM

This Delicious Looking Taco Truck Was Also Home To Colorado’s Biggest Meth Dealers

"Customers could literally walk up to a food truck and order a side of meth with their taco."

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CBS - Authorities have made one of the largest-ever single methamphetamine busts in Colorado history. The Colorado Attorney General’s Office announced on Monday that 17 people were indicted by a grand jury for operating a network that sold meth in the Denver-metro area. The sting was called “Operation Cargo.” “The 64-count indictment alleges charges that include violations of the Colorado Organized Crime Control Act, possession with intent to distribute a controlled substance, conspiracy, money laundering, and tax evasion,” the Attorney General’s Office said in a statement. The U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration, West Metro Drug Task Force, Adams County District Attorney’s Office, Thornton Police Department and Denver Police Department assisted in the bust. “After conducting five wiretaps over five weeks, 55 pounds of meth were taken off the streets,” Attorney General John Suthers said. “The brazenness of this ring was astounding. For example, customers could literally walk up to a food truck and order a side of meth with their taco.”

 

The ol’ Gus Fring model of selling meth. Open a fast food place, make meth, profit. Tried and true. What’s pathetic is they only had 55 pounds. What a joke operation. Go rob a train, you softies. 55 pounds is hardly a shipment. While I still appreciate a good meth ring, but 17 people were arrested in this one. That’s absurd. You don’t need 17 people to move 55 pounds. That just makes you a shitty drug dealer. And also, let’s re-read that one part. “For example, customers could literally walk up to a food truck and order a side of meth with their taco.” That’s amazing. I don’t know if it’s the best way to move drugs, or worst way. No code words. No hand signals. It’s “uhhhhh, 2 carnitas, 1 steak…no no, is the barbacoa good? Ok 2 carnitas, 1 barbacoa, and a diet coke…and yes, thank you for asking, 1 meth please.” Can’t imagine how they got caught.
 

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By Nate posted September 23rd, 2014 at 1:30 PM

The Caps Winter Classic Jersey is FIRE

  I thought I would hate it but it’s fucking FIRE. It’s different. But in a good way. Classic but not tacky. The stripes work. The stars are poppin. It’s not at all boring like it looked when it was just a crest. Gonna melt the ice on New Years Day. It’s a perfect mixture [...]

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I thought I would hate it but it’s fucking FIRE.

It’s different. But in a good way. Classic but not tacky. The stripes work. The stars are poppin. It’s not at all boring like it looked when it was just a crest. Gonna melt the ice on New Years Day.

It’s a perfect mixture of paying homage to DC and the old Washington Senators, paying homage to their old jerseys, and mixing in the new as well. I really like it.

10/10.

 

By Nate posted September 23rd, 2014 at 12:30 PM

MFK Tuesday in the DMV – Two Models, One Very Feminist Emma Watson

Carolina Cruz: Chelsea Heath: Emma Watson: So what we have today are two models who have new photoshoots, and one Emma Watson who is this ultra uber mega feminist now. While Carolina and Chelsea are taking off their clothes and taking pictures with their asses in your face, Emma Watson is wearing pants suits and [...]

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Emma Watson:

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So what we have today are two models who have new photoshoots, and one Emma Watson who is this ultra uber mega feminist now. While Carolina and Chelsea are taking off their clothes and taking pictures with their asses in your face, Emma Watson is wearing pants suits and talking to the UN about equality or something like that. Very disturbing, I know. And that’s where this MFK comes in. Watson has this cultish, must-marry following. Because she is so very good looking and has that Harry Potter money in droves. But now she’s giving speeches to the UN? The ringleader for #FeministNation? Ouch. This decision is a tough one.

Marry: Chelsea and her sweet, sweet ass.

Fuck: Emma. Obviously. No better way to put her in her place than to tell her you love her, give her the ol’ 1-2 (pumps), and then peace out. Break her to her core.

Kill: Carolina.

By Nate posted September 23rd, 2014 at 12:00 PM
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